Couples’ games with accessories: where to start?

Couples’ play accessories let you vary sensations and explore new dimensions of pleasure. But where should you start? This guide introduces essential accessories, ranked from beginner to advanced, along with selection criteria, hygiene tips, mistakes to avoid, and recommendations based on your preferences.

❓ Frequently Asked Questions

Long-Term Couples Guide Sensory Play Guide Sexy scenario guide Free Games Guide

Last updatedMarch 19, 2026

Couples' play accessories: the basics

Accessories make it possible to diversify games and explore new sensations. They can be simple — blindfolds, dice, feathers — or more sophisticated — cuffs, vibrators, massage candles. The choice should take three fundamental factors into account: the couple's level of experience, mutual preferences, and safety.

One principle guides the choice of accessories for beginners: start with the accessory that requires the least technical preparation and offers the most psychological comfort. A silk blindfold meets both criteria — no instructions, no learning curve, immediate sensory impact.

The recommended progression by level

Level 1 — Beginners: simple sensory accessories

The blindfold / sleep mask — deprives one partner of sight to heighten tactile and auditory sensations. A silk or satin blindfold is gentle on the skin and reassuring. Suitable for everyone from the first time. Choose an opaque but non-constricting blindfold — the partner must be able to breathe freely and remove it easily if needed.

The feather / silk scarf — exploring the body with soft materials creates light sensations that activate low-pressure cutaneous mechanoreceptors. Alternating between a feather (light stimulation) and a silk scarf (more enveloping stimulation) creates a varied sensory palette. No risk, no preparation.

Naughty dice — randomly suggest actions and body parts. Chance adds an element of surprise and removes the pressure of making a direct request. One die indicates an action (kiss, caress, blow, massage), while the other indicates a body area. Ideal for couples looking to break the ice without too much involvement.

Challenge cards — offer scenarios or actions to perform, sorted by intensity level. They let you try out ideas without having to put them into words yourself — reducing the awkwardness of making a direct request. Choose a game whose cards match the couple's comfort level.

Level 2 — Intermediate: sensations and stimulation

Fur or fabric cuffs — allow you to explore gentle restraint and vulnerability. Fur cuffs are soft, comfortable, and easy to use. Fabric cuffs with Velcro fasteners offer easy control — the partner can free themselves if needed. A safeword is essential. Never fasten the cuffs too tightly — check that two fingers fit between the wrist and the cuff.

Massage candles — produce warm wax that becomes massage oil as it melts. They combine three effects: ambient lighting, fragrance, and gentle warmth for massage. Choose a candle made from soy or vegetable wax—with a melting point of 40–50 °C, well below the 60–70 °C of a regular candle. Always test the temperature on your wrist before applying it to your partner. See our selection of massage candles.

Couples vibrator — designed to stimulate both partners simultaneously. Choose a medical-grade silicone model that is phthalate-free and waterproof for easy cleaning. Read the instructions for use and start at the lowest intensity. Clean with soapy water or a sex toy cleaner before and after each use.

Warming massage oils — warm up through contact with the skin or friction. Check compatibility with condoms (oily products degrade latex) and ensure they contain no allergens. Test on the crook of the elbow before use. See our selection of massage oils.

Level 3 — Advanced: in-depth exploration

Nipple clamps — apply controlled pressure to the nipples, creating a sensation that combines slight pain and pleasure. Reserved for couples who have explored and enjoyed sustained nipple stimulation by other means. Start with spring clamps with adjustable pressure. Never leave clamps in place for more than 10–15 minutes.

Progressive-size anal plug — anal stimulation that can enhance sensations for both partners. Start with S sizes (maximum diameter of 3–4 cm). Always use a compatible lubricant. Choose a plug with a flared base (to prevent the risk of complete insertion). Progressing through sizes is essential—never start with an advanced size.

Bondage rope — aesthetic and sensory restraint derived from the practice of Shibari/Kinbaku. Choose a cotton or treated-jute rope, never nylon or polyester (risk of cuts and chafing). Learn at least the basic knots and safety points (never around the neck; check blood circulation regularly). A gesture-based safeword is essential if the hands are tied.

The suction clitoral stimulator — micropulsation technology that simulates oral stimulation. Choose a model made of medical-grade silicone with different intensity levels. Particularly effective for women who have difficulty reaching orgasm through penetration alone — a scientifically documented pleasure tool.

Accessory selection criteria

Preferred materials

Medical-grade silicone: non-porous, phthalate-free, hypoallergenic, sterilizable — the best choice for sex toys that come into contact with mucous membranes
Stainless steel or borosilicate glass: non-porous, sterilizable, compatible with all lubricants
ABS (hard plastic): acceptable for non-penetrative items or with a condom
Cotton, silk, satin: for blindfolds and restraints — soft and washable

Materials to avoid

Porous PVC and vinyl: absorb bacteria and are difficult to disinfect properly
Non-medical-grade latex: allergy risk, degraded by oils
Uncertified cheap plastics: may contain endocrine-disrupting phthalates

Lubricant compatibility

Water-based lubricant: compatible with all materials and condoms — the universal choice
Silicone-based lubricant: degrades silicone sex toys — avoid with these accessories
Oil-based lubricant: degrades latex (condoms and latex restraints) — incompatible

Hygiene and care

Before first use: wash with hot soapy water or a specific sex toy cleaner
After each use: clean immediately, then air-dry or dry with a clean cloth
Sterilization: medical-grade silicone and stainless steel can be sterilized in boiling water or in the dishwasher (without detergent for silicone)
Storage: in a clean fabric bag or in their original box — never in a drawer with other objects
Shared toys: use a condom for shared sex toys or reserve each accessory for a single partner

Comparison table of accessories by level

Accessory	Level	Sensation provided	Safety points	Who it's for
Silk blindfold	Beginner	Enhanced tactile sensation	Easy removal	All couples
Feather / blindfold	Beginner	Gentle stimulation	No risk	All couples
Naughty dice	Beginner	Surprise, lightness	No risk	Beginners, long-term
Fur-lined handcuffs	Intermediate	Gentle restraint	Safeword, not too tight	Established couples
Massage candle	Intermediate	Heat, fragrance, touch	Test the temperature	Sensory couples
Couples' vibrator	Intermediate	Adjustable vibration	Medical-grade silicone	Curious couples
Nipple clamps	Advanced	Pressure / pleasure	Max. 15 min, adjustable pressure	Experienced couples
Progressive anal plug	Advanced	Anal stimulation	Flared base, gradual size progression	Exploratory couples
Bondage rope	Advanced	Aesthetic restraint	Knot-tying training, never the neck	BDSM couples

Common mistakes to avoid

Buying without consulting each other: discuss it before purchasing an accessory — make sure both partners like it
Choosing an accessory that is too advanced for the couple's level: start one level below what you think you are ready for — it is almost always the right choice
Neglecting material quality: cheap sex toys may contain phthalates — choose certified phthalate-free brands
Forgetting lubricant: essential for all penetrative toys — choose the right base for the accessory
Not testing it on yourself first: before using a candle or oil on your partner, always test it on your own wrist
Skipping aftercare: after intense accessory play, aftercare is especially important

In brief: couples' play accessories

Start with simple sensory accessories — blindfolds, feathers, and dice — before moving on to technical accessories
Choose medical-grade silicone, stainless steel, and borosilicate glass for accessories that come into contact with mucous membranes
Use a water-based lubricant with silicone sex toys
Clean before and after every use — hygiene is non-negotiable
Buy together — never surprise your partner with an accessory they did not choose
Safewords and aftercare are essential from intermediate-level accessories onward

Written by Alicia Deroussen, founder of Adopt1Toy — open, judgment-free advice, offered with kindness.

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In the shop: our selection of couples' games — Peach silicone suction clitoral stimulator · Womanizer Pro suction clitoral stimulator.

FAQ – Couples’ games with accessories

A silk or satin blindfold is the best starting point—no instructions needed, an immediate impact on sensations, and no risk. Sexy dice are also an excellent way to get started, as they take the pressure off making a direct request. These two accessories combined make it possible to enjoy an exciting evening without any prior knowledge.

Material quality comes at a cost, but it is non-negotiable for accessories that come into contact with mucous membranes. A certified medical-grade silicone vibrator costs between €30 and €150—an investment justified by its durability and safety. Simple sensory accessories (blindfolds, feathers, dice) are inexpensive at every price point.

Starting with the most discreet accessories—an erotic card game or some playful dice—that aren’t yet clearly identified as sex toys. Introduce them in a lighthearted context rather than as something filling a “need” or solving a “problem.” If your partner refuses, respect their decision without insisting—and revisit the subject a few weeks later if you’re still interested.

For the most part, yes—the models designed to be worn during penetration stimulate the clitoris and the penile area simultaneously. However, their effectiveness depends on each couple’s anatomy, so read the reviews and choose a model with a satisfaction guarantee or a flexible return policy.

A communication signal is recommended—it can simply be “stop” or an agreed-upon gesture. With a blindfold, the partner whose vision is restricted may feel more vulnerable than expected. Knowing they can stop at any time with a simple word creates the psychological safety that allows for freer exploration.

With warm water and mild soap or a specialized sex toy cleaner, before and after each use. Medical-grade silicone models without an electric motor can be sterilized in boiling water. Never submerge a motorized toy that is not waterproof. Air-dry and store in a clean fabric bag.

With prior training and a gradual progression, yes—but not without preparation. Advanced accessories (bondage rope, adjustable clamps) require learning basic techniques, understanding contraindications (areas to avoid, maximum application time), and following strict safety guidelines. Rushing into these accessories is the most common mistake and the source of negative experiences.

For scarves and blindfolds, yes—a regular silk scarf works just as well as a blindfold designed for the occasion. For other items (spatula, belt), caution is advised: materials not intended for intimate use may irritate the skin, break, or create unforeseen risks. Specialized accessories are designed with specific safety features.

Alicia - Adopt1Toy

Before creating Adopt1Toy, I spent 10 years in brick-and-mortar love shops, advising thousands of customers on choosing sex toys, sexual practices, and intimate safety. I also worked for several years at major lingerie brands, which allowed me to develop in-depth expertise in materials, body types, and comfort.

For every guide I publish, I rely on thorough research: scientific studies, public health data, and surveys on real-life practices—which I cross-reference with my hands-on experience. My goal is simple: to give you reliable, precise, and accessible information on topics that are still discussed far too little.

Learn more about me