Belt guide: complete guide

The strap-on is one of the sex toys people talk about least openly—and yet it's one of the ones that offers the best discoveries. Whether you're curious about pegging, looking to explore prostate stimulation, or simply want to understand how it works before buying, this guide brings together everything I know about the subject after years of advising my customers.

I wanted to create a genuinely useful guide—not a product list disguised as content. So I went looking for scientific data and studies on real-life practices, then added what I observe every day in the shop. Here's what I found.

What exactly is a strap-on?

A strap-on—also called a strap-on dildo or penis harness—is a dildo attached to a harness worn around the hips, allowing vaginal or anal penetration of a partner. A strapless strap-on, on the other hand, is a model without a harness that stays in place thanks to an insertable end placed in the vagina—the wearer experiences sensations simultaneously with their partner. Both allow penetration, but their design and sensations are different.

The term pegging more specifically refers to a woman penetrating a man anally with a strap-on—a practice that is being discussed more and more, with the taboo around it rapidly receding. According to a survey published by the Feeld app in 2025 and reported by Dazed Digital, interest in pegging among cisgender men increased by 200% in three years. The desire to use sex toys as a couple also increased by 400%.

Who actually uses a strap-on? The data

I like to rely on real figures rather than assumptions. Here's what the studies say:

A large survey conducted by Autostraddle among more than 23,000 women with female partners (updated in 2024) reveals that 59% enjoy strap-on sex and that 55% use strap-ons—or dildos—during sex. So it isn't marginal—it's a central practice in many relationships.

Among heterosexual couples, a study published on PubMed Central reveals that 30% of women and 35% of men had practiced anal penetration during the previous year. A 2023 qualitative study published in the Journal of Positive Sexuality involving 15 heterosexual couples who regularly practice pegging reports better emotional connection, heightened arousal, and more intense shared pleasure.

Why the strap-on is interesting for prostate stimulation

This is one of the most underestimated aspects of the strap-on. The prostate — sometimes called the P-spot — is located a few centimeters behind the anus, beneath the bladder. It is a highly potent erogenous zone for men, yet one that is rarely explored. I discuss it in more detail in my article on the taboos surrounding prostate stimulation.

Stimulating it with a strap-on — or a curved dildo compatible with a harness — can produce orgasms described as particularly intense: some men report around 12 pelvic contractions during a prostate orgasm, compared with 4 to 8 for a typical penile orgasm. The refractory period is also shorter. Discover our selection of prostate stimulators suited to this use.

To reach the prostate effectively, a dildo that curves slightly upward is ideal. The prostate is only 5 to 8 cm from the anal opening — what matters is the curve and precision, not the length.

How to choose the right strap-on size

This is often the first question — and the answer is almost always the same: start smaller than you think.

Experts recommend a length of 12 to 15 cm with a diameter of 3 to 4.5 cm for a first strap-on — or first harness-compatible dildo. That's enough to reach sensitive areas — the G-spot or prostate — without discomfort. Choosing a size that's too large for a first time is the most common mistake I see in the shop. The body needs time to adapt, particularly to anal penetration.

The idea is to make progress: start comfortably, build confidence, and adapt your practice at your own pace.

Materials: what really matters

The golden rule for a strap-on is to choose a non-porous material. Why? Because a porous material traps bacteria in its microscopic cavities, even after cleaning. And if you use the dildo — or cock — anally and then vaginally — or if you share it — it poses a real risk of infection.

The materials I recommend:

• Medical-grade silicone: my first choice. Flexible, non-porous, easy to clean, and heat-compatible. Non-motorized models can be boiled for complete disinfection.
• Borosilicate glass: non-porous, hypoallergenic, compatible with all lubricants. More rigid — best reserved for people already comfortable with penetration.
• Stainless steel: the same benefits as glass, with a weight that provides a different sensation of presence.

The materials to avoid at all costs: cyberskin, TPE, and jelly. They are too porous, degrade quickly, and cannot be properly disinfected.

Choosing your harness: the different types

The harness is just as important as the dildo itself. A bad harness ruins the experience—instability, discomfort, and lack of control. Here's a comparison of the 4 main types:

Panty harness or jockstrap

This is my recommendation for beginners. Easy to put on like underwear, comfortable, and adjustable. Ideal for first-time use.

Strap harness

More adjustable and compatible with a wider range of body types. It takes a little practice to put on correctly. It's the choice of people who use a strap-on regularly and want optimal support.

Leather harness

Stylish, sturdy, and very popular in BDSM practices. However, be aware that leather is porous and cannot be sterilized. If you use it with multiple partners, choose a machine-washable nylon or neoprene harness instead.

The strapless strap-on

A harness-free model that stays in place thanks to an insert placed in the vagina. The person wearing it experiences sensations simultaneously. These models require a little practice but are very popular for mutual stimulation.

Lubricant: essential, not optional

I repeat this to every customer who asks me about it: for anal penetration, lubricant isn't optional. It's a necessity. The rectum doesn't produce natural lubrication—unlike the vagina—and forcing penetration without lubricant can cause painful microtears.

• Use a water-based lubricant: compatible with all materials, including silicone
• For anal penetration, a lubricant specifically formulated for anal play is even more comfortable—it helps the area relax gradually
• Avoid silicone-based lubricants with a silicone dildo or dildo toy—they degrade the material
• Apply a lot—more than you think you need—and add more during use if necessary

Hygiene and cleaning: how to do it properly

A well-maintained strap-on lasts for years. Here's my routine:

• After each use: wash the dildo with lukewarm water and mild soap or a sex toy cleaner
• For complete disinfection (a non-motorized silicone dildo or sex toy): boil for 3 minutes
• If you switch from anal to vaginal penetration with the same dildo: change the condom or clean it carefully between the two — the microbiomes are different, and mixing them can cause bacterial vaginosis
• For a nylon or neoprene harness: machine wash at 30°C
• For a leather harness: use a special leather cleaner, never large amounts of water

Strap-ons and erectile dysfunction

This is a lesser-known but real use: a strap-on can be used as an external penile prosthesis for men with erectile dysfunction. A medical study published on PubMed Central highlights that a strap-on replicates the movements of natural intercourse and can reduce performance anxiety. It is a non-invasive, drug-free option that helps maintain a fulfilling sex life. I think it is important to discuss because 97% of the patients concerned have never tried one — often due to a lack of information.

Common mistakes to avoid

• Choosing a size that is too large to start with: guaranteed discomfort and a reluctance to try again
• Neglecting lubricant: especially for anal penetration, this is a mistake that can cause pain
• Improperly adjusting the harness: an unstable harness prevents control of your movements
• Using a porous material: cyberskin, TPE, jelly — absolutely avoid these for hygiene reasons
• Going directly from anal to vaginal penetration without cleaning or changing the condom
• Not communicating with your partner: this is the foundation of any successful sexual exploration

Are you just getting started with strap-ons? Also read my article beginner's strap-on: everything you need to know to get started on the right foot. And discover our full selection in the strap-on collection.